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Writer's pictureAnghel Sabina

The psychology behind a gaslighter



“I was just joking!” or “You’re being crazy” are just a few of the favorite lines of a gaslighter. These people will manipulate you into doubting your own sanity or judgements and perception of reality, by convincing you that you are misinterpreting, misunderstanding or misremembering your own motivations and behavior. This form of emotional abuse could happen to anyone- and maybe it already happened to you!


Ever felt like you're questioning your own thoughts or feelings? Maybe you've been made to think you're overreacting or imagining things? That could be the work of a gaslighter. Gaslighting is a sneaky form of manipulation that messes with your perception of reality. Let's dive into the psychology behind this unsettling behavior.


At its core, gaslighting is about control. Gaslighters aim to gain power over others by making them doubt themselves. It's like they're holding a mirror that distorts reality, making you feel like you can't trust your own judgment.


One of the tricks gaslighters use is to gradually chip away at your confidence. They might start small, making subtle comments that undermine your beliefs or experiences. Over time, these little jabs add up, making you question what you once knew to be true.


Gaslighters are often skilled manipulators. They're adept at twisting situations, flipping blame, and making you feel guilty or confused. They might deny saying something they clearly did or shift the focus to make you doubt your memory. This constant confusion leaves you feeling off-balance and dependent on their version of reality.


But why do people become gaslighters? Well, it's not always straightforward. Sometimes, it stems from their own insecurities or a need for control. Other times, it might be learned behavior from past experiences or even a way to cover up their own mistakes.


Interestingly, gaslighting often happens in relationships where there's an imbalance of power. This could be between partners, friends, or even in a workplace setting. The gaslighter thrives on the sense of dominance they gain by making the other person doubt themselves.


Now, how do you deal with a gaslighter? Firstly, recognizing the signs is crucial. Trust your instincts and seek support from trusted friends or professionals who can provide an outside perspective. Setting boundaries and maintaining a sense of self-assurance can also help counteract their manipulation.


Remember, being a victim of gaslighting doesn't reflect on your intelligence or strength. It's a sneaky tactic that anyone can fall prey to. By understanding the psychology behind gaslighting, you can begin to take steps to protect yourself and regain control over your own reality.


In a world where honesty and trust are vital, recognizing gaslighting behavior is crucial. Don't let anyone dim your light or distort your truth. You deserve to feel confident in your own thoughts and experiences.


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