Have you ever felt embarrassed because someone caught you while talking to yourself? Or have you ever wondered if self-talk is actually a normal behaviour? If that is the case, you are certainly not alone!
To begin with, let’s all remember the popular phrase from the animated film “Luca”: Silenzio, Bruno! But maybe you haven’t actually seen the film, and you are wondering who Bruno is. Either way, it is common knowledge that on any given day, we have thousands of thoughts going through our mind, which are often called our “inner voice.” From muttering “Why did I set the alarm so early?” to ourselves in the morning to desperately shouting “I can’t do anything right!” when breaking a glass in the kitchen, all of us engage in self-talk as part of our cognitive process, and the main characters of this film are no different.
When Luca expresses his fear of failure, Alberto immediately answers with these memorable words: “I know your problem. You’ve got a Bruno in your head. I get one too, sometimes. Alberto, you can’t. Alberto, you’re gonna die. Alberto, don’t put that in your mouth. Luca, it’s simple. Don’t listen to stupid Bruno.” Here we can see the concept called “distanced self-talk," which means talking to yourself as if in conversation with another person.
It’s quite obvious that Bruno is a metaphor for the naysayer inside our heads. This voice aims to keep us in a secure, comfortable box that may not bring the most fulfilment to our lives. Too often, we lead with our mind but are never fully content with its logic. However, choosing to silence Bruno is an action connected to the idea that taking chances and being uncomfortable is how people actually grow and change.
But is Bruno always a villain? Or can Bruno be a hero, too? The conversations we have with ourselves can be either destructive or beneficial, and people are becoming more aware that positive self-talk can be a powerful tool for increasing our self-confidence.
Scientists are still working to answer basic questions like, “Why do some people self-talk more than others? What areas of the brain are activated during self-talk? And how does this activation differ from normal conversation?” What is certain, though, is that engaging in motivational self-talk has been shown to increase focus and help tackle everyday tasks. For example, one study of tennis players found that incorporating positive self-talk into their practice increased their concentration and accuracy. And just as chatting with a friend can help decrease stress, speaking directly to yourself may also help you understand your emotions.
Today, there’s a field of psychological treatment called cognitive behavioural therapy, or CBT, which is partially focused on regulating the tone of self-talk. Cognitive-behavioural therapists often teach strategies to identify cycles of negative thoughts and replace them with neutral or more compassionate reflections. Over time, these tools can improve one's mental health. For instance, therapists often teach people the 3Cs: Catch it, Check it, Change it, and encourage them to apply this strategy to self-stigmatising thoughts. In this way, humans can figure out if their thoughts are helpful and valid and decide whether they want to keep them or not. After that, they can consciously switch to thinking more accurate and optimistic thoughts.
The next time you find yourself chatting with yourself, remember to be kind. Maybe you can spend a few days listening closely to your inner dialogue. Are you supportive of yourself? Are you critical or negative? Would you be comfortable saying those thoughts and words to a loved one? Are you viewing one incident as either good or bad without considering that reality is rarely black or white? These questions can really help you adopt a new approach to self-talk by bringing your thoughts into a more positive light.
All in all, self-talk is the script you use to frame your life, and you have more power than you actually believe. Always remember that “I cannot do it.” can become “I will give it my best shot,” and “I don’t know anything.” can become “I want to learn.” As David Taylor-Klaus once said, “Words matter. And the words that matter most are the ones you say to yourself.”
Bibliography:
Implementing the EASE Shift Perspective principle: CBT Techniques- https://www.mirecc.va.gov/visn5/training/docs/Handout_Shift_Persp.pdf
Is it normal to talk to yourself? - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iNyUmbmQQZg
What Are the Benefits of Self-Talk? - https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/self-talk?c=1607389620030#selftalk
Silenzio, Bruno! -Silence Your Own Inner Naysayer https://www.anewhopetc.org/post/bruno
Internal dialogue or self-talk- https://www.cbttherapies.org.uk/2014/07/28/internal-dialogue-self-talk/
What is positive self-talk? - https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/positive-self-talk#summary
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